How to find a topic simple three points to help you find a chat topic 1 Comment / Default / By huanggs
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Each of us will chat with others. Chatting requires topics.
We talk to others may not be based on the premise of understanding each other, and we do not need to be similar or equal. As long as there is a topic of discussion, you can have ideas with the other party.
So this requires us to be good at finding topics, discover topics, and produce topics in the process of talking to others. A good topic can make each other’s conversation smoothly.
In other words, good topics are the medium of preliminary conversation, the basis for in -depth discussions, and the beginning of openness.
The so -called “good topic” is that one party is familiar, can lead each other, or both parties are interested, can talk deeply, and even have content to discuss space.
What do we do to find such a good topic?
It can be constructed from the following aspects.
The topic of choosing the other party’s interest. Everyone has a “excitement” in their hearts. When we face strangers, if we want to talk happily, we must find this excitement, which is where the other party may be interested.
The people are interested in the topic. It must be what the other party wants to talk, loves and talks. Even if you are silent, people who will not express them can open the box when they touch such topics.
. For example, I went to a friend’s house for dinner for the first time. The nephew of a friend is a 9 -year -old child. He has a more restrained and shy personality. He may be criticized a little because of his homework problems that day.
This at the time he saw me and ignored it, giving people feel polite. Listening to a friend, he likes to play games, especially to play that GTA5. So I used this as a chat topic, took out my mobile phone to search for the content of the game, and then pretended to ask him not to understand.
The little nephew has just started to resist. As I pretended to ask him some games, he slowly talked and became more and more excited. At this time, he could transfer to what I wanted to talk about. I will ask him: You are so powerful to play this game, is it not good for writing homework? Then he naturally shows me his real situation.
This is the importance of the topic.
In the choice of topics, different occasions, different people, there will be different skills.
Coloning with male friends can find topics around career pursuit, or current affairs economy, and even science and technology development. Talking about work, talking about life, of course, you can also talk about playing programs. If you are a female friend, then talk about emotions, mood, makeup, skin care, and shopping, you can trigger the other party’s excitement.
In the “mixed fish dragon” group, sometimes it is not easy to distinguish the situation of others. The most secure way is to dig out the topic of interest from their current conversation. After all, everyone has what they like. Even if a person who is silent, as long as he talks about what he likes, he will become endless.
I really can’t distinguish, just ask the other party what you usually like to do.
everyone likes to talk about their own affairs to satisfy their own “protagonist” psychology. Find this excitement point on the other party, and the topic comes.
The topic should be introduced according to local conditions. According to the situation, because of the local, because of the time, because people introduce related materials as the topic, the conversation can become more natural. Of course, the topic is also the main thing of the other party.
In general, with the help of the other party’s name, age, place of origin, clothing accessories, or the environment, the topic is promoted, which can often open the box of others.
The advantages of this approach are flexible and natural, and collect materials on the spot. Of course, this also requires the speaker to think agile, be good at observing, and be able to carry out rich associations from the outside world.
For example, when I sang KTV before, my friends sitting next to me, I felt a little uncomfortable. Later, when I heard him sing so well, I used this as the entry point and asked if he often came to KTV to sing. He said no, just happened to play by chance. Then I continued to talk to each other around this point, then our conversation went smoothly.
The conversation from shallow to deep, you can find topics in this way. For example, participating in the event to sit in the neighbors of a stranger. If you do n’t know what to talk about, you can follow the existing information, such as the other party ’s current situation, throw some shallow questions, such as asking him.” May I ask him to participate in this event. Is it? “, Can you talk about it.
Whether the other party answers or not, or directly answers you, “I’m here to interview”, then you can continue to talk about this answer, and continue to ask, “Really? Is it who interview and who? Is it your job? “
In this form, long -term conversations can be carried out from shallow to deep; good chat, and even more and more fun.
The form of a common language through the media is actually the extension version of the above method, and it is also based on the situation on the scene, but this “on -site situation” is related to the other party.
It in other words, looking for the media between yourself and strangers to find out the common language, you can shorten the distance between the two sides. For example, if you take a car and see the girl next to you hold a book, you can ask: “I’m sorry, is it xxxx in your hand? Because I also read the book review before I did n’t buy it. I do n’t know what you think after reading it? “
The things about others’ specialties or possessions show that they have no malicious views, so that the conversation will be proceeded smoothly.
of course, don’t say anything if you see anything, after all, each of us is more or less alert to others.
. For example, the other party is very careful to hold something cautiously, and does not want to let others feel in touch, then it is best not to come forward and ask Dong to ask. Otherwise, it will be annoyed by the other party, but also easily bring embarrassment to themselves.
sm no pots do not open any pot, know how to observe words and ask questions so that the conversation can be carried out according to your own rhythm.
How to reduce the “checking” conversation of the other party is the most taboo in chatting. On this basis, we must know how to perceive and avoid each other’s minefield.
So if you chat with each other, don’t keep communicating in the way of “checking the household registration”. You must properly “express yourself”, express your own opinions, share your stories, and let the other party understand us. Such as:
A: Have you graduated now?
A: I graduated from the previous year and worked for two years. I always feel that knowledge and experience is often not enough. Are you working now? Is there such a feeling.
B: I just started working, and I slowly felt this.
I. After answering “right”, A did not ask immediately, but first talked about your own situation, so that the problem had a buffer, and at the same time revealed his own voice, so that the other party felt that you really chatted. At this time Ask the second question again, the other party’s willingness to answer is even higher.
In addition, your conversation must give each other a reasonable purpose as soon as possible, it is best to give it at the beginning.
The human brain often likes to rationalize some of our external behavior. When the other party is not very familiar with you, and you do not show your purpose, your behavior motivation is to guess the other party to guess.
, because people are born with self -defense, the other party generally imagines what you do as a martial arts to increase the alertness.
In order to let the other party try to let go of your intentions, your conversation must first show the goal, and “because” is the best sentence to give the purpose. For example, the example of “reading a book”, do you directly ask “May I ask this book?”, This statement is not enough. The other party does not know what you suddenly ask yourself what it is for.
but if you add a “because” behind this sentence, saying “Because I have read this book on the Internet before, it is generally not good, so I always want to buy When reading this book, I asked what you think. ”
Is when you show your purpose, the other party knows that your question was for this reason, and then you naturally let go of your heart.
So, whether you are talking or asking for a friend, or if you want to meet your friends, you must give a reason for your conversation to rationalize your behavior. Otherwise, even if you chat for half an hour, the other party does not know what you come up to chat for him. Turning around may talk to friends that this person is so strange, and come to me for no reason.
The conversation with the opposite sex, even if you don’t want to show that you want to know the purpose of the other party, you must give other purposes, rationalize your speaking moves, and reduce the other party’s “thought”.
The first conversation Note: 1. For those who are less words, they must take the initiative to find the opportunity to expand the topic. Of course, it depends on the situation and pays attention to observing the other party’s reaction, because sometimes it is easy to scare others.
So we must observe the words and see the opportunity to talk about it. In addition, before you speak, it is best to have a vision of vision with the other party at least twice to let the other party know your existence, otherwise you will suddenly run up and chat, and the impression will not be too good.
2, sincerity is the primary step of developing intimate relationships in the future. When you meet for the first time, your attitude and behavior of your speech must be generous and natural, and don’t be restrained, otherwise you will leave the impression that others are too active and frivolous.
3, usually people are most concerned about their own questions. As long as you ask the question and listen carefully, the other party must respond to us kindly and give us the opportunity to express ourselves. As soon as you come and go, it is easy to get closer to the distance between the two. Don’t talk about yourself when you come up, it is easy to make the other party dislike.
4, usually Pingshui meets. Everyone just uses chat to drive boring or embarrassment, so don’t think too much to wear too many “armor”. Let go of your heart and talk boldly on the premise of respecting others; if you give good faith, the other party still responds to indifference and arrogant attitude.