Let new dog owners beware! Raising a puppy is not for the lighthearted. Even though they're ridiculously cute, they will give you hell by chewing, pooping, getting into trouble, and their little teeth and claws are sharp!
Oh you'll be rewarded all right. Have no fear about that! But your puppy will require your care and attention, and it's a responsibility not taken lightly as outlined in this poem:
A Poem for the New Puppy Owner
Don't smell crotches, don't eat plants.
Don't steal food or underpants.
Don't eat my socks, don't grab my hair...
DON'T RIP THE STUFFING FROM THAT CHAIR!
Don't eat those peas, don't touch that bush!
Don't chew my shoes, what IS that mush?!?
Eat your cookie, Drink your drink,
Outta the toilet! Outta the sink!
AWAY FROM THE CAT BOX, IT'S FOR THE CAT!
(and must you kiss me after that?!?)
Yes, raising a puppy, Is not for the lazy.
Though puppies are funny, They're also quite crazy.
But don't despair Though its toil and strife,
After three years you'll get back your life!
So let's go for "walkies", You can "do your thing"
(and perhaps I'll get back MY GOOD DIAMOND RING!)
(©) Judith Belsham Singer